Look to the east, there is nothing can see
Look to the south, there is nothing in sight
Look to the west, there is only disaster ahead
Look to the north, there only has a beast
Looking in front, but you are not in sight

If you don't need me then please don't pretend you need me
And get the fuck out of my life

Finally I see HER again for God knows how many months
Though we chat almost everyday through msn
However, i still prefer face-to-face conversation
Yea it gives me a chance to confess, express how I felt to you
But does it really matter to you?

*I guess not*

My friend told me once, it still hurts when he see someone he really fall for before
I told him to relax blablabla stuff,
It sounds easy, he also understand what am I trying to say,
But doing it is another story.
After i sent her back home,
I really want to drive back home without caring the speed limit, but i didn't,
I take time instead.
New environment really change and shape people surround you, your friend, boy/girlfriend..etc
Both in good and bad ways.
I realize your changes,
There is something I can see behind you,
I don't want to say anything,
But what if the thing I see is true, she is gonna fall so bad..
However you cannot stop her from doing anything,
I don't have the right and I won't
Just wish I am wrong and all the best..
But if you don't believe what I am telling you,
Why you bother asking in the first place

May be it is time to fade
Let me fade, let me vanish
Let me rot, let me perish
I will be the current to help you fly
Spread your wings and shine
Like the sparkling firework
Don't look back
I will be the smoke remain
Wind will blow me away
You won't be seeing it again

-edit-
this picture is just for fun, but i think most guys share the same feeling..lol

Raining outside, raindrop non-stop hitting the rooftop
That is how heavy the rain is
Can hear the complain from the roof,
The rain keeps hitting onto it, TITIITDODODODo
May be it is better to hit it through
Instead of hitting on it continuously

broken

May be it is time to move on
May be you make up your mind already
Let it be, if that is our destiny
Let it go, but the scar is still there
I thought it won't hurt, but obviously I am wrong
Why I cannot erase you away from my heart, mind and soul
I don't want to be like that anymore
I cannot hold anymore harm and pain
My body is already torn into pieces
I have no more strength to fight anymore
Why don't you just make an end now and ever
Let me break into pieces and let the wind blow me away
Let me lay on the ground, everywhere, anywhere
I believe one day there is someone can make me complete again
I hope that is you, but is it possible

Drink Drank Drunk

Drinking alcohol like water, keep swallowing down even the taste makes me sick
Alone in the corner, staring at the ripples slowly spread
Alcohol kicks in and you are along with it
Slowly flashing back the time that we had
Spacing out, looking at the air, the smoke and dust form your lovely face
That is so fragile,
I wish I can touch you, but you will be vanish if I place my finger on it
You are so close, yet so far
Leaning back, hoping the heartbeat will slow down
Close my eye, hoping can calm my mind
Breathing slowly, just wish I can breathe the same air as you
But you will never know, I guess no one will ever knows

Back again

When is the last time since I post anything on my blog (here or xanga)?? May be around three months already.. Yea I know my blog is a bit emo, it is emo because I am suffering from Seasonal Affective Disorder and Insomnia.

You know you cannot sleep, and you just let your mind wander, to lalaland or wherever your mind want to go, somewhere you wish your mind can rest and chill, ironically, it always go to some place deep down in your unconscious, dig out something you try not think, not to touch throughout the day or for a long period of time.. it is cruel to me, but somehow you just cannot control yourself..